Online and offline, men are angry when women resist being under their control. Why is it so difficult for men to accept that a relationship has ended and the solution to their pain is killing their ex-girlfriend?
Category: relationships/dating
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This is NOT A Free Speech Zone
You have no rights of free speech on this web page. You speak like you have some sense and your comments will be posted. You can disagree with anything written here, but you best do it in a respectful way. Pretend like your momma is reading it and check yourself.
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Oprah Named Highest Paid Celebrity by Forbes
Dr. Dre and Tyler Perry also landed slots on the coveted Forbes list.
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EXCLUSIVE: Listen to Meshell Ndegeocello Cover Nina Simone’s ‘To Be Young, Gifted and Black’
Listen to Ndegeocello’s cover of ‘Young, Gifted and Black’ featuring Cody ChestnuTT.
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Have You Joined Perfspot Yet?
Perfspot
PerfSpot is so called because it is designed to be the “perfect” place from which to begin one’s exploration of the immeasurably vast world of the Internet. It’s an ambitious aim for a social networking site, and PerfSpot does not disappoint in its fulfillment of this aim. PerfSpot members, who sign up for free, get to participate in a virtual community. They can post images, videos, music, and words to communicate about themselves and their interests. They can find fellow users whose interests match their own–or simply fellow users whose personal photos intrigue them. Users can participate in community opinion polls, and can share their views on anything in the world.
These days, people are used to the Internet. PerfSpot.com truly re-captures the excitement of being on the Internet during its early days, when communication with people from all over the world was recognized for the revolutionary phenomenon that it was. The site gives its members countless opportunities to meet new friends, find new interests, or simply share their achievements with the rest of the online world. Click Here to get started
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Dating Advice For Black Singles
I first met my ex-boyfriend while a sophomore in college & he was a senior. We first started as BUDDIES but our relationship quickly blossomed & we had a relationship for nearly 5 years. After graduation & entering the real world of a lack luster job, our relationship began to get very rocky for several reasons. Just before our 5 year mark, I asked for time off. We both were not happy individually or together. I was hoping the time apart would allow us to work on our personal issues & solidify our relationship.
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Rejection and Dating – Why Rejection Hurts
Rejection can hurt like hell and cause wounded singles to bunker down to lick their ego wounds. What these singles don’t realize, however, is that rejection may hurt but never under any circumstances should rejection ever be taken personally. However you were rejected and for whatever reason you were rejected, there are a few key steps to recovery. These steps won’t stop it from happening again but they will make you a better person for your experience!
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When He Won’t Take “No!” for an Answer
No! is a complete sentence and easy enough that anyone should understand its meaning. Yet when told no by a female, most men’s response is not “okay” but instead “well, why not?” or “how come you said no?” or “you don’t mean it!” or “but you’ll like it if you try it.” Such questions put females on the defensive and are nothing but denials of a woman’s right to say NO! and be taken seriously.
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Why I Celebrate Serena Williams’s Nude Cover—and Why You Should, Too
There’s been much talk about Serena Williams baring it all on the cover of ESPN the Magazine’s the Body Issue. Find out why ESSENCE associate editor Demetria L. Lucas thinks all Black women should celebrate this moment.
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Secrets and Lies: Confessions of a Mistress
The true story of one young woman who had a relationship with a married man until she learned the error of her ways.
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Bridal Bliss: Essence and Jaime
A look inside the Hollywood wedding of actress Essence Atkins.
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Is Alicia Keys a Homewrecker?
Singer Mashonda allegedly wrote a letter to Alicia Keys about her estranged husband Swizz Beatz. Get details on the ongoing saga.
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Why Weak Men Want Submissive Women
The brainwashing of females by men in their lives as fathers and pastors, deacons and ministers is complete when women make statements that agree women should be submissive to men because it is a woman’s nature. It is not in a woman’s “nature” to be anything but great and powerful self-actualizing citizens of the world. Yet various cultures and religions have limited female options and choices based strictly on gender. Women of today, their mothers, and their mother’s mothers have all been socialized by men to believe that men are superior and that women should subjugate themselves to males, but that is nothing but a lie.
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What Black Women Need to Be Happy
Black women are tired of hearing Black men say that we are bitter, unhappy, or that we alone are responsible for the high numbers of single family homes and fatherless children. We’re not. Black women are tired of the bullshit, the blaming, the failure of men to step up to take responsibility for the mistakes they’ve made. We, just like women of other races, deserve to have a decent, loving, committed and honorable man in our arms. We deserve wonderful fathers for our children. We deserve to have respectful Black men be our husbands as well our lovers. Where are these men?
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UPDATE: Kelis & Nas: Where Do They Stand?
Our ESSENCE.com insider spotted estranged couple Kelis and Nas at an event last night with baby Knight looking very much like they were back together. Find out where they were and tell us if you’re rooting for their reunion.
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Chilli on Her New TV Show, Dating as a Single Mom and Usher
We caught up with the southern beauty to see how her new dating series is different from other reality shows, why she’s open to men of all backgrounds and whether there’s any chance for a reconciliation with Usher.
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UPDATE: Kelis & Nas: Back Together?
Our ESSENCE.com insider spotted estranged couple Kelis and Nas at an event last night with baby Knight looking very much like they were back together. Find out where they were and tell us if you’re rooting for their reunion.
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Men That Don’t Take Responsibility For a Pregnancy Are Punk Bitches!
I’m tired of hearing Black men whine that they aren’t ready to be a father and that he shouldn’t have to pay child support for a kid he didn’t want. Look here fool… if you are having sex bare with a woman you know is fertile, you are ready to be a father whether you affirm it vocally or not. Actions speak louder than words. You are doing everything it takes to become a father, right? So what are you talking about you ain’t ready?
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Single Black Females: Where Do We Go From Here?
Professional writer and editor Elayne Fluker shares her thoughts on being a successful, single Black woman.
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Mother Knows Best: Why I Choose Not to Live With My 10-Year-Old Son
A New York City woman shares how she made the painful decision to send her 10-year-old son away to Atlanta to be raised by his father.
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The 3 Types of Black Men
After studying Black men for more than 4 decades, I’ve come to the conclusion that there are three different types of Black men. Sadly, more than half of the Black men in the dating pool are misogynists and truly hate women; their treatment of and the thoughts they express about Black women prove it.
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It’s Just a Woman’s Power
A mature man comments on the female powers of observation and shares a little advice with the fellas… “Men we now have to start coming clean using truth and honesty if we hope to keep our women. This knowledge has me a little paranoid when I meet a woman… now is she looking at me from the inside out? That can’t be a pretty sight because I got issues. Not being as handsome as most and now I know I’m certainly not as smart, I have to be more honest and forthright to attract the opposite sex.”
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My Soul Mate
At the beginning of time, the Creator split one soul into masculine and feminine energies. Those energies evolved over the course of many lifetimes, perfecting themselves so that they could be reunited in the physical plane as one. You, my love, are my twin flame, my divine right partner, the yin to my yang and I am now made whole again with you.
Making love to you is transcendent. Every breath you take I feel as my own. I can’t tell if I’m inside you or you are inside of me. My vibration rises and my senses become overwhelmed when I’m with you. I have nowhere to hide, nowhere to run. Your gentle moans of pleasure fill my ears when no one is around and your touch caresses me throughout the day.My fears, dreams, hopes, and aspirations are wrapped up in you. Your fingertips hold my pleasure; your shoulders carry my insecurities and doubts for me. Your mouth speaks the words that soothe my savage soul. Your tears wash away my hurt and I am baptized in the sweetness of your nectar.
I want you to know that only you can fulfill me and there is no reason to for me to look elsewhere. I feel electricity and sparks every time I see your face, every time I look in your eyes. I want to kiss you for hours, losing track of time. I want to be late for work because we can’t bear the thought of starting the day off without connecting. I want to bathe in your essence my soul mate. -
Men Want to Know: What Do Women Want?
Men are confused about what exactly it is that women want. I am here to tell you guys “You have the power to make her childhood fairy tale fantasies of a hero come true!” With a little effort, any man can incorporate these seven points into his dating bag of tricks. Follow these guidelines and and do all you can to become the man a woman is looking for. You can easily inspire women’s respect, passion, and love – and your single days will be over.
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Jerks, Assholes, Idiots and Abusive Behaviors: Recognizing Verbal Abuse
This article outlines five tactics abusive men use regularly to derail your confidence and prevent you from voicing an opinion about his nasty words, his disrespectful behavior or his sexist thinking. The bottom line goal for Black men of this type is to belittle and insult you so much that you shut down. He wants to be able to treat you any way he likes, and for you to take it without complaint.
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Dating Tips For Black Men And Women
Dating Tips for Black Singles
These dating tips for Black singles can be applied to two Black people dating one another or a Black person having a date with someone from a different ethnic background. The fact of the matter is that by and large dating tips for Black singles are pretty much the same as for any other group of people be they Asian, Jewish or whatever.
Dating tips for Black single women
Like it or not you know the guy you’re dating is going to need his ego boosting. It’s an odd fact but men out on dates seem to spend more time trying to get their own ego boosted than they will think about complementing you. Maybe it’s because they are actually unsure of themselves or maybe it’s just the way they’re programmed; but the ‘peacock’ idea of a guy out on a date is very real. Now constantly saying how much you admire what they’re wearing or how good they are at – whatever it is you’ve chosen to do; lets say bowling or dancing or skating – is one way to boost their ego. However, it needs doing succinctly or you could end up just sounding sycophantic. Let him know that you value the person not the action. Of course this is tricky to do on the first few dates as you probably won’t know the date that well. However, a dating tip for Black single women is when making a complement; make one that incorporates another personality trait as this will really act as a double ego boost. For example, rather than saying “great bowling” say something like “great bowling, I can see you’re really thinking about what you’re doing”. Get the idea? Another dating tip for Black single women can be a real tester, but; don’t phone him after the first date, if you’re really keen on him – let him do the chasing and call you first. He’ll love the idea of ‘being in a chase’ and you’ll know just how keen he is on you by how quickly he wants to see you again. Whilst some guys would be flattered that you’ve phoned them others could go all cool towards you thinking that you’re getting ‘clingy’ with them. Be strong – and wait for him to call you – then you can start reeling him in.
Dating tips for Black single men
Don’t take offense guys, and this comment is not just a dating tip for Black single men – but all men. You might think it’s all manly and heroic to turn up for a date straight from the Gym. In itself that’s OK – but don’t cut the time so short that you leave for your date before showering. Yes a woman will find the male pheromones you give off attractive. Unfortunately dried and stale perspiration will have the opposite effect. Another dating tip for single Black men is, if you have to meet up with your date straight from work and whether or not it’s due to unforeseen circumstances, apologize for not having had the time to get home and change first. You don’t need to say anymore than that – but you are making it clear to your date that you’re not turning up at your date intentionally without first having had the chance to shower and change. She’ll admire and respect you much more for those few words. Some men need the next tip and some don’t, but of all the dating tips for Black singles – a guy mustn’t forget to complement his date on something, and preferably as soon as he sees her and then remember to complement her throughout the date. Most Black guys out on a date really try to impress and invariably like it when their date complements them. The same is true for your date, so don’t get so wrapped up in yourself that you forget to complement her. Saying something like “you look wonderful tonight” will always go down well. However, to avoid keep repeating yourself pay attention to the conversations you’re having and pick up on the clues and prompts that are in it for you to find something to complement her on. An easy dating tip for Black single men here would be: in a conversation about hair just saying something like “I love the way you’ve done your hair tonight” – will be great. -
Black Dating – The Online Experience
African American online dating is fast gaining headway as far as online dating is concerned. As a matter of fact there are numerous African American dating websites nowadays.
African American dating websites is one example of specific dating services. These websites help the black people to find their prospective partners in life. Like any other online dating sites, one has to register to enjoy the services and create one’s profile.
There are African American dating websites that come for free, while others will charge a minimal fee to cover for features that are loaded into the websites. Afro American websites boast of an easy access and instant communication with prospects owing to the website infrastructure such as chat rooms and instant messaging.
When you visit an African American dating website, you will find many interesting features. One thing websites of this nature give high importance to is safety. They are committed to provide users with safety and security as much as they put high premium to privacy.
There are many African American dating websites that you can visit and explore as nearly all African Americans accept interracial or inter-color dating.
To choose from the numerous websites, one can consider the following points:
-Easy accessibility to communication
-High security and privacy
-Higher standards in ensuring that profiles meet the criteria
-Registration and viewing of profile should be mandatory
-Combination of affordability and quality when it comes to cost
Further, in an African American dating website, members are carefully screened and highly encouraged to report inappropriate behavior, if any. The websites also regularly provide online tips and guide to dating. They take the education of their members on the field of online dating seriously. They aim to educate their members to make prudent decisions in using the websites.
African American dating websites are probably more exciting than any other dating websites. Online dating is demonstrating to go beyond just being a trend. African American has a distinct culture that brings them closer together. They are also more open to interracial dating.
Almost all, if not all, African American dating websites have photo galleries so one knows what to expect in a prospective partner. The websites also guarantee that you can meet black people internationally.
There are various testimonials on how exciting and effective these African American dating websites can be, as there are many success stories. Prior to joining, it will help if you carefully go through the testimonies to see whether or not the
website is for you.There are free and paid African American dating websites. If you are not yet sure if you really are into online dating then you may want to explore the free services. Otherwise, you will be able to enjoy the many benefits of paid African American dating services.
At the end of the day, it will be your preference that will matter. You can go through as many websites as possible to ensure that when you join a particular African American dating website, you get your money’s worth and more importantly, you get to meet your future lifetime partner. This article was about great expectations with dating and about african american online dating service.
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Tips For Dating An Older Woman
For mature women dating can be a difficult prospect. Life can be a challenge in many respects, from maintaining a career to maintaining a healthy social and dating life. Demands on our time and our abilities are higher than ever. The pace of life is faster, and the potential pitfalls can be greater, particularly as we get older.
This can be especially true for a mature woman, particularly one who is coming out of a long-term marriage and now suddenly finds herself on her own. Single again, on their own, many older women are frightened when faced with the prospects of seeking out a new intimate relationship. They fear the potential roadblocks to cultivating a new and healthy relationship, and these fears often unnecessarily stand in their way of finding a loving partner.
Fear can be a debilitating problem for mature women dating in today’s society, and unfortunately those fears are often unfounded. Senior women are looked on in a different light these days, not simply relegated to living up to the stereotype of a woman who should put her sexual life behind her. Indeed, older women are considered more vital and healthy than ever before; by wide segments of the population. Which means that these new levels of acceptance should encourage mature women to put aside their fears and concerns and actively pursue a healthy dating relationship.
Some mature women dating men, whether they happen to be of similar age or even younger, are demanding more from their relationships. Expectations are higher because more mature women no longer are accepting of the old society rules which say that an older woman should be more reserved and modest. These days, older women are more and more participating in healthy activities like exercise and good nutrition.
Older women are maintaining and even improving their minds and bodies, and are now refusing to deny that they continue to be sexual beings. In years past, such an assertive and aggressively vital older woman might have been considered in a negative light. Today, the healthy desires of a mature woman dating a man, older or younger, are earning well-deserved respect.
All of this means that men who are actively seeking a relationship with a more mature woman had better be prepared to take on the challenge. Older and active women are demanding more from their dates, they are no longer simply happy to “get out of the house”. They want to be respected and appreciated and thought of as sophisticated in ways that were once reserved for the typical older distinguished gentlemen.
Their potential mates should be on notice that the senior and single women of today expect to be highly valued by their partners. And in fact, that’s exactly how it should be. Older women need no longer accept “something less” from their intimate relationships. Despite the many challenges and potential pitfalls, for mature women dating can be fun, exciting, thrilling and fulfilling.
